You can have my Oxford comma when you pry it from my cold, stiff, and lifeless hands.
A poem by Julian Tirhma.
Gag. Hack. Beep. Guffaw. Giggle. Chirp. Cluck. Suck. Yawn. Buzz. Cough. Gurgle. Purr.
Whistle. Wheeze. Hmm. Spit. Click. Whoop. Swear. Gnash. Hum. Smooch. Hail. Burp.
I don’t procrastinate. I wait until the last minute to do things, because I will be older and therefore wiser.
God is dead - Nietzsche.
Nietzsche is dead - God.
God is Dad - Jesus.
Never ask someone eating ice cream straight out of the carton how things are going.
Baby Boomers: We gonna change the world.
Gen X: We don’t care.
Millennials: Stop calling us that.
Sometimes, I shock myself with the smart stuff I say and do. Other times, I try to get out of the car with my seat belt on.